


that'd be completely disrespectful

by bonestiltsbergara (showmethestars)



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved
Genre: Demons, Haunted House, I'm Sorry, IT'S YA BOY, M/M, buzzfeed unsolved - Freeform, spooky makeout sesh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-12
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-27 02:58:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12072225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/showmethestars/pseuds/bonestiltsbergara
Summary: “Hey ghosties, it's ya boys!”“Dude, seriously?? Every time...”“Don't be rude, Ryan. I'm letting them know we're here, and we're ready to party,”





	that'd be completely disrespectful

**Author's Note:**

> so.... this is the first fic i've written in like, 85 years, and yeah. hopefully it doesn't suck tooo bad. LEMME KNOW PLS THANK U

“Hey ghosties, it's ya boys!”

“Dude, seriously?? Every time...”

“Don't be rude, Ryan. I'm letting them know we're here, and we're ready to party,”

“You're being an asshole. Please take this seriously for once,” Ryan asked, shining his flashlight in Shane's face.

Shane laughed. “I am 100% taking this seriously, Ryan. You're the one being disrespectful,” he shot back, panning his GoPro across the empty room. “I'm trying to create an open, conversational atmosphere in this spooky house, and you're-”

Shane is cut off by Ryan's shriek.

“What is wrong with you, Bergara?” he asks, a playful tone to his voice.

Ryan backed up into Shane's side. He turns to look at him, his brown eyes wide.

“Dude, I sear I just heard a voice,” he said, panic rising in his voice.

“It was probably the wind. It is very drafty in here,” Shane replied, nonchalantly.

“That wasn't a fucking draft, Shane! It was a voice,” Ryan yelled, waving his audio recorder in front of Shane's face. “I'll fucking show you.”

Ryan fiddles with his device, and Shane waits patiently, watching his friend with mild amusement. Ryan rewinds the recording a bit, then hits 'play.' Shane listens to the sound of his own voice, arguing with Ryan.

“See?” Ryan said.

“It's a voice recording, Ryan, I can't see anything,” Shane replies in monotone. Ryan loudly shushes him and plays back the recording again.

“Listen...” Ryan says. “There!! Right there!”

Shane shakes his head. He admits he did hear a murmur, but it could've been anything, and he tells Ryan as much.

“No, no, no!” Ryan yells. “That was clearly a disembodied voice, saying 'be quiet!' See?! Even the fucking ghost wants you to shut up!”

“You're being ridiculous, Ryan! It was the wind! Or the recorder rubbing against your jacket, or a million other possible things besides a ghost,” Shane tells him. “I swear, we haven't even been here ten minutes and you're already freaking out.”

Ryan lets out a loud, exasperated sigh. “You are so... unendingly frustrating.... all the time,” he says, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers. He turns away from Shane and walks further into the house.

A few hours, and several Ryan screams later, the two investigators spread their sleeping bags out on the living room floor. Shane settles in quickly, and watches as Ryan lays down, keeping his trusty bottle of holy water next to him. He arches an eyebrow as Ryan looks at him.

“Scoff all you want, Madej, but I'm ready for these demons,” Ryan says.

Shane laughs. “Oh, yeah, I'm sure those punk ass demons are soooo scared of your three week old, half empty water bottle,” Shane shoots back.

“It works, Shane.”

“Oh yeah?” Shane replies, a sly smile playing at his lips. “You hear that, demons? Ryan Bergara isn't scared of you!”

“Shane!”

“Punk ass demons!”

“Shane, Jesus Christ-”

“DEMONS!! YOU COWARDS!! SHOW YOUR- ” Shane is quieted by Ryan shoving his hand over his mouth. It makes Shane suddenly aware of how close they are laying next to each other. He looks up at Ryan's face, and can see that his eyes are open wide.

“Shane, just, stop. Please,” Ryan pleads, his voice tinged with fear and just a little bit of amusement. 

After a moment, Ryan removes his hand from Shane's mouth, although his fingers linger on Shane's stubbled cheeks for a few moments. Shane can feel his cheeks heat up, and is thankful for the darkness.

Ryan slowly withdraws his hand, and turns to lay on his back. They sit in awkward silence for a few minutes until Shane finally closes his eyes and drifts to sleep.

Less than thirty minutes later, Shane is woken up by, yet again, Ryan's yelp and his body pressing back against his own.

“Did you hear that?” Ryan asks quickly, his voice a loud whisper.

“The only thing I heard was your scream, like always,” Shane replied, trying to quiet his own heartbeat. Ryan's body being so close to his own had caused it to start racing, and he could hear it pounding in his ears.

“I swear I heard a whisper or something,” Ryan said. Shane heard the plastic crunch of the water bottle, and knew Ryan must've grabbed and pulled it close to him.

Ryan was still breathing heavily, and Shane could feel him trembling slightly. He hesitantly put his arm around Ryan's body, and gave him a reassuring squeeze.  
“You're safe, Ryan. I'm here,” he said quietly, his voice just above a whisper. He feels Ryan slowly turning his body to face him, and Shane can feel Ryan's warm breath against his lips.

Shane only thinks for a moment before pressing his lips against Ryan's. Ryan's lips are slightly chapped, but still soft and warm. They taste like coffee and spearmint.

The kiss is quick, barely even a kiss, but then Shane feel Ryan's hands on his neck, and suddenly they are kissing again. It's soft and electric, and Shane pulls Ryan closer, wanting to feel every inch of him against his own body. Their chest press against each other, and Shane feels the low rumble as Ryan moans against his mouth.

Ryan pushes Shane back, and suddenly he's straddling Shane's hips, his lips attached to Shane's neck, sucking and licking, and pulling wonderful noises from Shane's mouth.

Shane's hands trail down Ryan's body, stopping at his hips and pulling Ryan closer to him, groaning at the friction between them.

Ryan returns to Shane's lips, kissing him again, slowly this time, his fingers threading through Shane's hair and giving it a light tug. They finally pull apart, breathing heavily, and Ryan rests his forehead against Shane's. Shane's thumbs are tracing small shapes against the skin where Ryan's shirt had ridden up, and he smiles.

“I think...” Ryan starts, quietly, giving Shane another light peck on the lips. “That it would upset the demons if we had sex here.”

Shane nods in agreement. “It'd be completely disrespectful.”

Ryan sits up, still straddling Shane, and smiles. “Besides, this place is giving me the creeps.”

“Oh, we should definitely leave then...And get a hotel room,” Shane suggests.

“Yeah, because I'm scared.”

“And the demons.”

Shane and Ryan look at each other for a moment, and then burst into small giggles. “That's the best thing you've said all night.”


End file.
